joke<\/span><\/a>.<\/p>\nYes. All 6 feet and 8 inches of James Comey, the former FBI director who spent years weaponizing the Justice Department against President Donald Trump, is surrendering to federal authorities today after a grand jury in North Carolina handed down two felony counts, each carrying up to five years in prison.<\/span><\/p>\nTo quote the wise Hillary Rodham Clinton: \u201cNo one is above the law.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nI can\u2019t help but laugh at the sheer teenage drama of it all, because as a former teenage girl myself, I know this character arc by heart. Comey\u2019s entire career has been one long, awkward coming-of-age story, and he\u2019s finally reaching the make-or-break point of girlhood.<\/span><\/p>\nIn the beginning, there is a quest for autonomy. That early-teen \u201cyou\u2019re not the boss of me\u201d phase my mother begrudgingly endured, where you suddenly become the smartest person in the house. As FBI director, Comey weaponized the Department of Justice against a duly elected president, signed off on FISA warrants built on a phony Steele dossier, pushed the Russia collusion hoax for years, and leaked sensitive memos to the media while dressing it up as \u201chigher loyalty.\u201d Classic teenager move: convinced that perceived righteousness exempts you from the rules everyone else has to follow.<\/span><\/p>\nHe then enters the social performance stage of life, that unruly stretch of caring too much what your tribe thinks. Comey began this stage last year when he \u201cstumbled upon\u201d seashells on the seashore, arranged to spell \u201c86 47.\u201d For anyone who doesn\u2019t speak dinner-table shorthand: \u201c86\u201d has meant \u201cget rid of it\u201d since the 1930s. \u201c47\u201d is, of course, the 47th president, Donald Trump. But you needn\u2019t know either of those facts to get the message. At the time he posted it, Leftist protesters were plastering that phrase everywhere. It was the new viral call-to-death chant against the president.<\/span><\/p>\nComey himself admitted he recognized it as a \u201cclever political thing,\u201d before gushing over the \u201cartistic flair\u201d of the seashells, snapping a photo, and posting it to Instagram for his hundreds of thousands of followers. He knew exactly what he was doing.<\/span><\/p>\nThis is the same man who spent decades prosecuting gangs for far less direct threats, but he believes he\u2019s above institutional power, so he thought a simple \u201cdelete and play dumb\u201d would suffice. That\u2019s how coded language works in the assassination culture the Left has mainstreamed \u2014 where 56% of left-wingers say it would be somewhat justifiable to murder the president \u2014 plausible deniability built right in. \u201cThey were just pretty seashells!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nThis matters more than a beach photo op. At the time Comey posted it, Trump had already survived at least two assassination attempts. The shot had already been fired. The bullet had already grazed his ear. And Comey, the former head of the nation\u2019s premier law enforcement agency, decided that was the moment to signal to the mob.<\/span><\/p>\nFinally, Comey has entered his principled idealist phase. The late-teen \u201cI\u2019m immovable and morally superior\u201d stage. After the indictment dropped, Comey released a video declaring, \u201cI\u2019m still innocent, and still not afraid.\u201d He\u2019s the protagonist in his own head, forever the hero resisting the big bad demagogue.<\/span><\/p>\nWe can be certain of this because he quite literally wrote a book about it. His new novel explores how right-wing podcasters are radicalizing people into political violence.<\/span><\/p>\nYou can\u2019t help but laugh.<\/span><\/p>\nThe man who posted a public call to \u201c86\u201d a sitting president \u2014 one who had already survived multiple assassination attempts \u2014 is now lecturing America about incitement.<\/span><\/p>\nLet\u2019s also be honest about the obvious double standard: imagine, for one second, current FBI Director Kash Patel posting a photo of seashells spelling out \u201c86 46\u201d about Joe Biden. We all know what it would mean. We all know exactly how fast the media and the DOJ would have detonated. But when Comey did signal the useful idiots to remove the 47th president? Crickets.<\/span><\/p>\nThis was never about seashells. It\u2019s about an assassination culture the Left spent years building. The manifestos, the cheers when the bullet missed, the \u201cmostly peaceful\u201d rhetoric that somehow always ends with conservatives in the crosshairs. Comey didn\u2019t just participate in that culture. He performed it on the national stage, with his name, his platform, and his hundreds of thousands of followers, and then acted shocked when his actions had consequences.<\/span><\/p>\nAmerica\u2019s Tallest Teenage Girl is finding out.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nHe\u2019ll whine, he\u2019ll cry, he\u2019ll insist it was just a silly beach photoshoot. But we know better, and more importantly, so does a grand jury in North Carolina.<\/span><\/p>\nAs the teens would say, Karma is a B*tch.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n
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